Another Wednesday

The following scene is directly inspired from numerous chain mails that I read about the placement. It was hard to neglect the hatred and anger students are having. This is just the reflection of that anger that I have connected to one the famous movie scene. No intention of hurting anybody’s sentiments. I just empathized and started writing. I wrote keeping in mind that I am an angry student with lot of expectation and no job. I wrote it as a person with lot of work experience but no job. I don’t expect you to take this lightly, but I am just reporting what I have observed! Sorry once again, cheers!

On 31st March

Commander – Yeh, kya ho raha hai?

STUPID IB MAN(standing on the terrace of the new building of SIMSR) – apoorv theek keh raha hai sharma saab. apoorv, put the phone on loud speaker. I want the HR executive of Accenture to listen to this.
Main Coca Cola, Google, Vodafone aur Accenture ke HR executives ko maarna nahi, bulaana chaahta tha. And in fact you will do this job, today, and now!

Commander – Sorry main kuch samajha nahi.

STUPID IB MAN(moving here and there, with his hand gesture) – Sharma saab, what do you do when these companies don’t come to your college? We don’t expect them; we invite them every now and then!
Yeh chaar companies mere ghar nahi aana chaahte the, aur main mere ghar mein inko laana chaahta hun.

Commander – Who are you?

STUPID IB MAN- Main woh hun jo aaj Bus aur Train mein nahi chad sakta. Train mein chadd kar jaau toh kahan jaau? Main woh hun jo GD dene jaata hun toh uski girl friend ko lagta hai ke jung pe jaa raha hai. Harr do ghante mein phone karti hai ke chaai pee nahi, khaana khaaya ke nahi, Darassal woh yeh jaanana chaahti ke mujhe naukri mili ke nahi!

Main woh hun jo kabhi short list hi nahi hota, toh GD se nikal jaata hun. Main woh hun jo sign up dekhke shaqq karta hai. Aur main woh bhi hun jo daadhi badhaane se darrta hai, yeh soch ke kahin koi company aa jaaye aur shave na karna padey.

Jhagada kisi ka bhi ho aap sab buddho mein, bevajah meri naukri nahi lagti hai. Aapke placement talks ki jabbardasti ki bheed toh dekhi hogi na aapne, uss bheed mein se koi ek shaqal chunn lijiye, main woh hoon. I am just a stupid IB man, wanting to invite companies!

Commandar :- Aaj achanakk yeh stupid IB man kaise jaag gaya!

STUPID IB MAN- Kyu jaag gaya toh taqleef ho rahi hai, ghutt ghutt ke berozgaar rehna tha mujhe? Aur yeh achchaanak nahi hua Sharma saab, yun samajh lijiye ke time nahi mila. CP ke exam ke liye paddhte paddhte yeh kaam zara neglect ho gaya, lekin der aaye durust aaye. Woh baaki ki ek company bhi aaj hi aaegi.

Commandar- Yeh chaar hi kyu? Aur bhi kitni saare companies hai jo hamaare yahan nahi aati.

STUPID IB MAN- 3 ki meine lottery nikaali, ek se personal contact hai! ๐Ÿ˜›

Commander – tum ho kya? Marketing mein ho? Finance mein ho? Fresher ho? Work ex waale ho? kya ho?

STUPID IB MAN – Mere specialization ya experience ka isse koi lena dena nahi hai. I said I am just a stupid……

Commander – darr hona chahiye tere mein, aur tu yeh mat sochana ke tu berozgaari ka zhanda dikhaake bachh jaaogey. You will be out of placement. tum jo saabit kar rahe ho na…

STUPID IB MAN(interrupting) – Main saabit kuch nahi karna chaahta Sharma saab, main aapko yaad dilaana chahta hoon, ke baccho mein gussa bahot hai, unhe aazmaana band kijiye.. We are resilient by force, not by choice! Aur kaunsi placement se bahar karogey bhai?

Aapko kya lagta hai ke yeh Wellingkar, FORE waale jyaada intelligent hai? Arre internet pe ‘placement agencies’ karke search maariye you will get 352 sites. All the information is accessible and that too free. Aap jaante ho ‘colleague with good contacts’ is also a potential ‘placement agent’?

The problem is with us that we get used to all this. Ek aisi company aati hai toh internet ke uppar search karke info nikaal li, chain mails kar diye, Shukar manaaye ke hum log short list ho gaye aur fir company nahi aati toh ladne ki wajah adjust kar lete hai. Hamaari bhi majburi hai na, humein placement se baahar nahi hona saab.

Issiliye hum Placement Cell chunte hai (Error:- aap placement cell chunte ho), ke woh placements sambhaale. Aap log, College, PCOM, Intelligent & smart members, saksham hai aise companies ko bulaane ke liye magar aap log kar nahi rahe, sirf justification diye jaa rahe hai. Why are you not nipping them in their !@#. Ek company aa rahi hai ke nahi yeh jaane ke liye aapko 4 mahine lag jaate hai? Aapko nahi lagta ke yeh aapki kaabhiliyat par sawaal hai? Yeh saara naatak band hona chahiye, this bloody system of PCOM is flawed. Agar aap jaise log inn companies ko nahi bulaaenge toh humein hi kuch karna hoga.

Sharma saab mujhe lagta hai ke jo companies nahi aayi, woh sirf ek bad news nahi thi, woh ek bahot badda sawaal tha. Woh sawaal tha ke hum toh tumhaari college chodkar wellingkar, FORE, TAPMI, jaayenge tum kya kar logey? YES, they asked us this question. First on 21st December,then repeated it on Monday (4th Jan,2010). I am just replying on a Wednesday (31st March,2010)

Commander (thinking of some justification): This is not the correct approach

STUPID IB MAN(Hand movements getting vigorous) : I am not concerned about the approach, but of the result. I always knew what loss is. I have seen my friends scoring less marks in CAT but getting reasonable jobs from other college. Apno ko job lagte hue dekha hai meine. Lekin saab, yeh acceptable nahi hai.
Unhe fakra hai FORE, Wellingkar, pe.. yahan takk ki Chetana aur Dalmiya pe, mujhe fakra hai mujhpe ke mein aise logo ko bulla raha hun. Main koi masiha nahi hun, aur yeh mein sirf apne liye kar raha hoon. Main chaahta hun agar koi SIMSR mein mera dost aaye toh use kahin bhi, kabhi bhi job lag jaaye.

Commander โ€“ Main tumhe samajh nahi paa raha hun

STUPID IB MAN โ€“ Obviously I am talking sense and not shit.
Commander โ€“ shayad

STUPID IB MAN – be definite, Shit or Sense?
Commander โ€“ I think.. blaah blaah blaah.. plop plop plop..

STUPID IB MAN- Yeh aapki galti nahi hai. IB se ab yahi ummeed karte hai. IB ki tarah jeeyo aur IB ki tarah bardaasht karo aur IB ke tarah chale jaao. Apne aap ko hi dekh lo, jab aapko maalum nahi tha ke main kaun hoon, aap mujhse darr bhi rahe the mujhe seriously bhi le rahe the, ab aapki aawaaz mein achaanak ek confidence aa gaya hai. Aap soch rahe hongey, โ€˜Accha, PG ka nahi, IB ka hai, fir toh aur bhi aasani se justify karungaโ€™


15 Responses to “Another Wednesday”

  1. 1 Lalit
    March 7, 2010 at 1:51 am

    Awesome dude…u have written what we all feel and go through day in,day out…..

    • March 7, 2010 at 12:06 pm

      Thanks Lalit, I know exactly what you guys feel.. Frustration is an ‘understatement’..

  2. 3 Patil
    March 7, 2010 at 4:18 am

    i hav tears in my eyes
    fcuking sH@rma

    • March 7, 2010 at 12:18 pm

      Same thing happened to me when my cousin called me and asked,’should i take admission in ITM, Somaiya, Dalmiya OR should I wait for an year?’. And you know what is shocking, this advise was given to him by an employee of one of the companies that visits our campus. I was still not able to accept this fact that we are actually one of them.

      And it hurts when we all know that the placement scenario would have been different. Specially when we have potential to do so. All of us are having such experiences and embarrassing questions to answer. As of now, I am giving very diplomatic answer and that is

      ‘Convert all the calls first, then we will decide on where to go, this way you will have good GD/PI practice’

      If placement scenario improves after 31st march, then I will recommend it. Otherwise, I will think of some other answer!

  3. 5 SAM
    March 7, 2010 at 11:21 am

    Dude, I do not even read about multibagger stocks with such detail.

    Was glued to your post till the end.

    • March 7, 2010 at 12:24 pm

      HAHA. arre even after writing this, I read it at least 10 times man!

  4. 7 gaurav
    March 7, 2010 at 3:16 pm

    awsum…..awsum…..dts the only word to de3cribr it……….
    …only one regret yaar….aaj tak main iss scene ko dekh kar kafi emotional n patriotc feel krta tha bu APOORV DIXIT u chnged it all…now whnevr i’ll c this scene i’ll rembr ths post of urs…

    • March 8, 2010 at 1:41 am

      thank u sir for reading!

  5. 9 sushant
    March 7, 2010 at 3:51 pm

    This article is pure BLASPHEMY…Apoorva Dixit pe fatwa lagao aur iski naukri wapas lo…humare param pujya pratah smaraniya Commander sir pe aisa article bardasht nahin kiya jayega…

    • March 7, 2010 at 7:05 pm

      haha! agar lagaana hi hai toh placement lagao sub ki.. fatwa lagaane se tumko agar job milti hai toh lagao woh bhi! ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. 11 Abhijit
    March 7, 2010 at 4:51 pm

    amazing dude…

    just mind blowing.

    • March 18, 2010 at 12:58 am

      Thank you sir for reading! I don’t think this applies to your college! ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. 13 Ankit
    March 8, 2010 at 1:29 am

    Simply Todu… !!
    Dude… whats your fees…? I’ll try my best to save and become your disciple… boliye?

    • March 8, 2010 at 1:33 am

      haha. Bhai, Artists aur khaas karke guitarists se hum paise nahi lete! ๐Ÿ˜› bus salute karte hai aur seva mein haazir rehte hai! ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. 15 Shweta Iyer
    March 15, 2010 at 12:13 am

    Hooked to the last line. Bloody Cool. Every Post of yours has a distinct impact on me. I want to be a writer like yourself too. That finese you have in your writing style is simply worth praising. For an amateur author, you write really well.
    Write some stories. You have qualified to reach that level now.

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